Love is a relative term, its type dictated by intention. Some people consider their affection for coffee to be a form of love, while others would be appalled at such a platonic use for the complex and vital condition. When it comes to romantic love, or love that lends itself to marriage or union, the intentions behind such bonds ultimately determine the success of the unions. In the story The Top and Ball, the naturally doomed fate of obsessive love, based solely on attraction, is displayed in the top’s desperate attempt to woo the ball.

Marriage based on proximity is not a novel concept. Many societies are limited in their populations, and those that don’t require pre-arranged marriages still insist that unions be within their society. This same proximal constraint is what originally prompts the top to ask the ball to marry it. In the limitations set beyond their control, the top is forced to choose from his immediate surroundings. So, when the top feels compelled to marry the ball, he is doing so out of a natural need to connect. He does not know this object, or have any real affection for it, nor has he considered what it means to love something forever, even beyond its years of beauty and usefulness. Therefore, the top does not love the ball, as it convinces itself it does when it realizes that it cannot have it, rather, it becomes obsessed with the idea of aligning itself with an object of beauty, that is considered desirable.

Much like the top has confused desire for love, the ball has a warped idea of what is important in a mate. When it refuses to even respond to the proposal from the top, the ball gives no consideration to the top’s qualities, outside of its physical appearance, whatsoever. Due to its own ego, the ball decides to pursue marriage with a sparrow, as it saw a better opportunity for itself in a nest. Later, when the ball and top meet in the dust bin, the ball refers to the top as “one of my own class”. The ball, no longer a desirable and attractive object, now considers the top to be of the same status as itself. Its attitude changed from the elevated sense of self-worth that prevented it from considering marriage to the top all those years ago.

When considering the intentions behind a marriage, both the top and the ball have distorted views of what constitutes love. The ball longs for status, and holds itself above others. It feels that its composition and beauty garners a better life than that which a top in a toy box can provide. The top, also possessing a delusional sense of what love should be, longs for that which is unattainable, primarily because it is unattainable. Neither object has any understanding of what constitutes love, or what the true purpose of marriage is.

Without mutual affection, respect, and understanding of what is important in love and life, there is little hope for a successful marriage. In our vanity and obsessive tendencies, it is easy to become wrapped up in the prospect of love and marriage, without exploring the truths behind the ideals. All beauty fades, all purposes wane, and unions that are created with only physical and material bonds will eventually fall through the weak foundations they are built upon.